2012: What I've learned.

pants & sweater: charlotte russe, blouse: thrifted, shoes: target

As 2012 comes to a close I find myself reflecting on my past year—it’s been the best one yet. I’ve learned so much about myself and I’ve changed so much. 10 things I learned this year in no particular order:

Be selfless. This has definitely been a huge factor in Rob’s and mine relationship. It is SO easy to be selfish and just do what YOU want. But I’ve learned that to show love to others, be selfless. Do what they want to do sometimes. Do kind acts of service. Put others first.

Sometimes people suck, find those who uplift you. I’ve discovered this year who really matters to me. When Rob and I got married, he told me some of my friends tried to talk him out of dating me. They told him, “I don’t think you’ll like Katherine... She’s weird.” After that I found people who love and care for me and would never talk about me like that.

Go after your dreams. This year I learned to believe in myself and follow my dreams. I want to be a designer and make clothing that is modest and awesome and affordable. I worked towards that goal this year and now I have so much faith in myself and my abilities. I CAN do what my heart desires. I have pushed out criticism and found that positive voice I need. It’s not always easy to pursue dreams. I’ll be the first one to tell you that I’m not the best seamstress—but I’m working so hard. I want to be good. I will be good. I can go after what I want.

Put God first. Sometimes this can be really hard. It’s hard to admit your faults and errors and let God help you. I’m a very independent person and I’ve learned that letting God help me is the best thing. He knows me. He loves me. He wants to help me.

My family is the best. After living permanently in Idaho and not being able to go home, I’ve realized how great my family is and how blessed I am to have them in my life—especially my parents. I wish we lived closer and I definitely appreciate them more than I ever have.

Rob trumps all. I learned that Rob will always be more important than anyone or anything. He will always come before anything else. He is my rock, my best friend, the person who loves me the most. I appreciate and love him more than anything in this world. We’re still figuring out this whole being married thing but I wouldn’t want to learn and grow with anyone else than him.

Find balance. I’m still working on this one. I put 100% into everything I do and sometimes that leaves me exhausted and too tired to the point where I don’t pay attention to things I should. I find myself having to tell myself: “It’s okay to take a break. Pay attention to Rob. You don’t have to be busy.” And then I slap myself in the face, go find Rob, and get some snuggle time in. Between work and school and homework and quality time with Sir Robert, there needs to be balance and I’ll figure it out sometime.

Stop comparing. Another one I’m still working on…. This one is tough for me.  I compare myself to others A LOT. It’s kind of a big problem to my self esteem. It’s part of the reason that I deleted my Facebook. I just kept getting sad and disappointed in myself when I logged on. I just kept looking at all of these people and their “perfect lives.” Which I know, no one has a perfect life but the internet makes it feel that way. We never post the real stuff. We post the pictures of Disneyland and parties that we attend. No one posts the nitty gritty stuff because honestly, who cares, right? But all that perfect made me feel empty. So I took a big step (haha) and deleted my Facebook. It’s been a really big help. I’m still working on not comparing myself to others and hopefully I’ll get over it soon ;)

Be happy. It’s hard sometimes with everything going on in life to just be happy. It’s easy to say “I’ll be happy when _____ is over.” But I’ve really tried to find happiness in all aspects of life. Yeah, I’ll for sure be happy when Rob and I are done with school and not so poor, but I’m for sure happy that I made the best decision of my life and married that boy. It’s all about finding happiness in your journey. Be happy with what you have and stop wishing it all away.

 It’s okay to please yourself. I’m a people pleaser. I always put others first and their wants and needs. Which isn’t a bad thing but I’ve found that it’s okay to do what I want sometimes and to express my feelings and wants and desires.

Well 2012, it’s been real. I’m excited for another year and definitely excited to spend it with the people I love.